It is still unclear to me at times why I desperately try to hang on to things for such dear life that I have no control over. I suppose for a very long time I decided I wanted to take control of each and every situation of my life. If I did not like where the progression of life was taking me, I would strive to step in and “right” what I thought was wrong even though I was intended to walk through it.
My control is a lot like a close pin. A close pin can grip things and hold items in place up to a certain point, but when something is too heavy for that close pin to handle, it will eventually either let go of the object or it will break under its weight. I cannot tell you how many times I have tried to take control of every situation I have come across, but I can tell you that my grip on circumstances is a lot like a close pin. I may be able to think I am handling it up to a certain point, but eventually I either lose grip or I break under the pressure.
Over the last six months, I have really been able to come to grips with this and to take ownership where ownership must be taken and also to let go of areas that are too heavy for me to attempt to fasten my grip to. I have learned to rejoice in the fact that I do not have to retain control of every situation in my life. In fact, it has been quite a joy and a relief to be able to let go of those things that I know I am not intended to carry and to give them back over to God.
In a hospital room, nine times out of ten, patients and loved ones look to us to be the strong ones. I believe that it is alright to not feel like we need to give an answer to every question that is asked. I think, actually a sign of maturity and a sign of validating someone’s fear or sorrow is to not shy away from actually saying, “I don’t know the answer to that question. I cannot even begin to understand what you are facing.” This may seem vague, but sincerity can calm hearts sometimes more than knowing all the answers to life’s questions.
I thank God for the large barriers in my life. I also thank Him for a weak grip I really have on the issues and circumstances I find myself in. To God be the glory, great things He continues to do.
No comments:
Post a Comment